3.12.2011

my creepy stalker post.

We found him.


Back up to fall 2009: We met Jared. We hung out with him a lot.


Back up a year: It was the end of freshman year and we all parted our ways. Jared left us with only a knowledge of his future residence and a slight promise that he might play hockey the following school year. He left me with a cell number that I labeled in my phone as "Jared... I think," because I didn't actually know if it was his number.


Back up to fall 2010: I asked the hockey team if they knew Jared. They did not, and it was sad.


Back up a few weeks: Jenna, Neal and I kept talking about how much we missed Jared. Jenna missed his wet, long locks, I missed his humor, and Neal missed being able to creepily worship and follow him around everywhere. We repeatedly mentioned different creepy ways of finding him. I said I would put his face on a milk carton. Jenna (okay, maybe Jenna and I) suggested we knock on every door in his apartment complex and ask "do you know Jared? He has hair and a hoodie." 


Back up to last Wednesday: I came home from class to Neal standing outside my apartment with... Jared. Neal was on his bike when he spotted our M.I.A. friend and immediately took off to drag Jared off to our dorm. We texted Jenna and made her come over, then we went to her apartment and played Super Nintendo for a few hours. We basically forced him along with us so that we could bask in his coolness. Jenna loudly whined the entire night that he was going to leave us and never come back.


Back up to last Thursday: Once again, we forced Jared to Jenna's apartment for Super Nintendo fun and drinks. Somehow, even though Jenna vowed against it, we ended up at Rancherito's (Beto's) at midnight. We dropped Jared off, and our lives became normally boring again.


He doesn't like the paparazzi.







We were creepily overjoyed.
















I will admit, this post is creepy, stalkerish, and just plain unsettling. But that's what I'm here for.


(to be fair, I told him I would blog about him. Even if he didn't agree to it, he still knows about it. And that's all that matters...)

3 comments:

Kelsey said...

A post after mine own heart.

taraya said...

This post has probably reached top 5 for me, out of your selection.

Or top 10 at the very least...

FAVORITE PARTS

winner:
"...suggested we knock on every door in his apartment complext and ask 'do you know Jared? He has hair and a hoodie."

bah ha ha.

runner-up:
"Jenna loudly whined the entire night that he was going to leave us and never come back."

and close third (because it rings so true):
"Neal missed being able to creepily worship him and follow him around everywhere."

golden stuff, singleton. simply golden.

Anonymous said...

I haven't seen Jared since that Thursday.

I knew he wasn't going to come back.

Jared...if you're reading this, please come back. We miss you!